In My Head!

Swati just called and as i did not have her number (blame my lost mobile and my bad memory) i couldnot recognise whose the number is and then when i came to know, i again found that josh in me - of the two forthcoming plays we are working on! They are of very different styles but both are going to be equally interesting. What is more important is the time that they will provide for all of us to be together and enjoy each others' company! I absolutely love the time we spend during the making of plays. While the play itself might take no time get finished. I sometimes give this logic for why flop directors go on. May be they just love the "making of a movie" so much that it take away all their passion - may be they want to relive that experience once more. And so they just go on!

At the same time other thoughts too are around - i feel their strong presence as Father Merrin felt the demon in The Exorcist. That reminds me of some new bruises which will take time to heal. I look in there and find they are still fresh and chocke my breathe when noticed. But cannot help. I see people moving around on the floor and everywhere out. And i notice not them today, but the Limelites in their hands. Many faces there but not a single glance of mine. Did i not deserve? And so i message a friend of mine. "Today i feel sad as i think in the first time in my life i am expecting something from something/one other than me". She calls but i message her "i am in a meeting will call you later". Having a life where i am taught never to rely on anyone for just anything, i feel its a sin to expect, especially when it is out of people!

Then i think at another face of it - why the expectations in the first place? What am i doing this for? Whom i am doing this for? And i get the an answer loud and clear - just i, me and myself! So where is the room for anything else to be thought? I was not promised by for a place in some magazine if i indulge into my own creativity! This and such thoughts help me return to sanity and for and then i hear Prasad calling "why is there and hour's delay in the ticketing system". I return to the real world again.

Song: You Sang To Me